Dominos & UNO

At no point did I think I would be hand expressing my boob while my husband holds a syringe catching the milk!

All these classes and midwife appointments and no one talks about the aftermath of child birth. I have to admit the midwives in the hospital were amazing but having a 60 year old woman sat on the bed ‘helping’ me breast feed my baby was not what I imagined. It was a strange experience, it was like I was in a hospital in 50’s. There was a midwife popping in my room every 10 minutes to check me and the baby over which is great until it’s 4am and you feel an inch on your arm so you wake up and realise there is a midwife 10cm away from your face saying “go back to sleep dear” and you just awkwardly stare at the ceiling waiting for her to leave. 

Talking of 4am the best part of my stay at hotel a la hospital was the pizza delivery I insisted Ryan got, sat eating pizza playing UNO looking at a baby I just gave birth to. It still didn’t feel real. That night we didn’t get any sleep mainly because we were sat staring at our little girl and secondly, who wants to sleep when your laying on a body length pad whilst what felt like bleeding to death. 

I expected to leave hospital the day I gave birth but because of my high blood loss during surgery I had to stay in a few days. I wanted to go home, in my comfortable space without anyone ‘checking’ every five minutes. Ryan poped home to get a few bits and within five minutes of him leaving for the first time I started to panic, I was left on my own with a brand new baby! I laid her in front of me on the bed while she slept and a midwife gave myself and the five ladies on the ward a chat about what to do when you leave hospital. 

Out of all six babies mine decided to scream and cry from the start I tried everything to stop her and I just remember thinking where the hell is Ryan, it had been two hours since he left. Once the midwife had gone and Grace stopped crying I called Ryan, no answer, called again still no answer. A few minutes later and he called back, he had fallen asleep on the sofa at home. 

He got back to the hospital and I was checked over by the doctor he said if the midwives have time to discharge me I could go home, luckily there was a surge of babies so they needed the beds and everyone on the ward was sent home. Before I left I was given two weeks worth of injections that I had to inject myself daily, say what?! Inject myself? I don’t think, I am a wimp! These were to stop blood clots or heart attacks I’m not sure which but I knew they were important, so I asked Ryan to give me them. For the next two weeks he took pleasure in stabbing me in the belly with what felt like a sword but really a needle the size of my finger nail. 

Home time! Yes finally I can go home drink a glass of wine, eat some pate and lay on my front when sleeping... or so I thought.